Christy next door is still moaning about his job.What's he got to moan about? Sure he wouldn't work in a fit, sweeps a few streets,then goes to the pub. He must be worn out.Said he's had the same sweeping brush for five years.Shows how much he uses it,lazy fecker.He said since he got it he's … Continue reading J is for Jimmy and joker.
2020 AtoZ
Blogging from AtoZ. April 2020
I is for inheritance.
Are you going on holidays, ma?Thinking about it, why?Where are you going?Not sure yet. Rome, India, the Bahamas.The Bahamas is very expensive.We have savings. You can't be spending all that.Why can't I?That's our inheritance.It is in its arse.I'm only joking. You go enjoy yourself while you can.What do mean, while I can?Clock is ticking ma, … Continue reading I is for inheritance.
H is for hypochondriac
Koko was over with me ma today and ma told her that she was having a stroke one day and I didn't believe her. 'You can be a bit insensitive sometimes ma' says she.'Your granny never had a stroke' says I. 'I'll tell you exactly what happened, she nearly gave me a bloody heart attack'. … Continue reading H is for hypochondriac
Eat pray love
Rome or India?For what?A break away.Oh lovely, but you know I can't go anywhere until the end of June.I meant on my own.On your own? Seriously?Yeah, why not.You hate being on your own.No I don't.You get koko to sleep with you when I stay over in my mas.That's just because we want to watch our … Continue reading Eat pray love
Farts #Bloggingfromatoz
See some poor young one ended up in hospital because she held her farts in for too long.Why would she hold her farts in?She didn't want to let one off in front of her new boyfriend.Could she not do it when she wasn't with him?Surely she wasn't with him 24/7?She could leave the room when … Continue reading Farts #Bloggingfromatoz
Dreams of an everyday housewife.
Is this it,Jimmy?What?Life.What do you mean?Get up, get washed, get dressed, have breakfast, hoover the stairs. Same shite everyday.You don't hoover the stairs everyday.You know what I mean. Housework, cooking, cleaning. It's all I do.You go to the supermarket.Be still my beating heart.What do you want to do?I want a bit of excitement before I … Continue reading Dreams of an everyday housewife.
Census
census night and Jimmy is not being very helpful.
Bionic
Ma, can you look after Beyoncè? Ive to bring Jay -Z to the hospital. What happened him this time?He fell in the yard in school, split his knee.Again? Its a wonder that child has a pair of trousers to his name.I think he'll need stitches, again.Holy mother of divine, that child's had enough stitches to … Continue reading Bionic
In my heart it’s spring…
Wouldn't it wear you out all the same, Bernie?What,ma?Winter.It would.Dark days, darker nights.The cold and rain.January is the worst, it's never ending.It's a whole season in itself.It'd put years on you. Will it ever end?What,January, Bernie.It's February,ma.Is it?The 7th.You just get so used to January, you forget other months exist.Well, its over since last Monday.Thanks … Continue reading In my heart it’s spring…
Remember me
Jimmy's ma is getting more forgetful lately. Howya, Lily.Who are you?I'm Bernie.Jack's sister?No, Jimmy's wife.Jimmy?Your son, James. James is in London working. He's home.Since when?1985.No one told me.He's just putting the kettle on.I'd better get his room ready.No need, Lily.But his bed is not made.Have a cuppa first, then I'll help you.If that young one … Continue reading Remember me
Diary of a Dublin Housewife 