A is for… April at last


So, who’s delighted to see the back of March? It was a whole season in itself wasn’t it?

I feel like I’ve lived half a lifetime in three weeks.

Who knew how serious things were going to get with the Corona virus? Well, apart from my ma that is. She’s still going on about me going to Benidorm with the girls. I’ll never hear the end of it. I rang her the day after I got home, three days later than expected due to baggage handlers being out of work with the virus. Thank God I packed that extra suitcase.

  • You never listen to me, Bernie.
  • No one knew how bad it was going to get ma.
  • I knew.
  • You know everything.
  • You were lucky to get home at all, you could have died over there.
  • We were very safe ma. the hotel was locked down, we didn’t go out until we were brought to the airport.
  • Not much of a holiday, was it.
  • I had a ball, and three extra days, all inclusive paid for by the airline.
  • Was it worth putting your life at risk?
  • My life wasn’t at risk.
  • Well, I hope you didn’t bring the virus home with you.
  • No, I didn’t.
  • But you were told to isolate immediately.
  • As a precaution ma. I’m grand.  for fuck sake.
  • What did you say? This phone line is very bad.
  • I said I feel great.
  • And now you can’t even visit me.
  • No I can’t.
  • Don’t sound too upset now will you. I’m high risk you know.
  • Oh I know ma, I know.
  • I told you how bad it would be, weeks ago. I kept telling you and you just laughed at me.
  • I didn’t laugh, I just told you to calm down with the panic buying.
  • Well, you’re not laughing now are you, stuck at home in isolation, and no food.
  • I have food in ma, I just don’t have my boxroom looking like Aldis stock room.
  • God knows when I’ll get to a supermarket again. I got my supplies in just in time. I believe they’re killing each other over toilet rolls.
  • You haven’t been to a supermarket in six months, and you’ve enough food to do you for another six months. People are bloody eejits. There’s plenty of toilet rolls.
  • Thank god Bernard got some for me, because you never did.
  • Good old St. Bernard.  How’s his halo?
  • What?
  • Tell Bernard I said hello.
  • I  said he got toilet rolls, you never did.
  • I heard you, anyway, they weren’t on your endless list.
  • I didn’t know they were scarce.
  • They’re not bloody scarce. More importantly, is he getting your meds?
  • He is, bless him. He leaves my milk and bread on the doorstep too. He’s not allowed in god love him.
  • I’m sure he’s devastated.
  • What?
  • I said you wouldn’t know what day it is.
  • Indeed you wouldn’t. Its awful not being able to go out.
  • You never go out ma.
  • But I knew I could if I wanted to.
  • But you never want to.
  • Well, I’ve no choice in the matter now.
  • That just suits you down to the ground.
  • What?
  • Nothing.
  • Things can’t get any worse can they, Bernie?
  • God only knows ma.

That was two weeks ago. Even then, we didn’t realise how much worse it was going to get.

25 thoughts on “A is for… April at last

  1. Ah!!!! I just found your posts for this year. For some reason your last year’s are stuck at the top of your blog? I guess your mom was right about the stocking up! Glad she has “Saint Bernard” nearby for her.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh I you went to Benidorm!? I lived near there for a year back in the early 70’s in a little village called Campbello near Alicante. It’s probably over grown and full of high roses now- back then it was lovely!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. it was. the village had maybe 1000 residents. We picked up Spanish quickly since hardly anyone spoke English. My oldest son was 9 and he went to public school there- he was really fluent by the end.

        Liked by 1 person

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