Sorry I’m a bit late to the party but I’ve been busy trying to write the book.
‘Diary of a Dublin housewife’ is coming along ( slowly but surely)
It was a great month for me. I made some friends, I lost some weight, I wrote everyday and got the boost to continue with the book that I haven’t touched in months.
The good news obviously, is the book is back on track, the bad news is I’ve put the weight back on. Don’t judge me, I need writing fuel…I can’t survive on words alone!
Thanks to everyone who stopped by to read and comment, you are the ones who gave me the boost to keep on writing. I’m sorry if I haven’t been around lately but I will catch up with all my new blogger mates as soon as I make a ham sambo and a cuppa ( I might even have a package of crisps…Stoppit! I told you not to judge me. I’ve enough of that from me ma)
Well done to everyone who survived the challenge. You’re all brilliant. So, keep on writing, keep on blogging and for those of you contemplating a diet – forget it. Life is too short to be nibbling celery and carrot sticks. Eat that jumbo breakfast roll, drink that glass (or bottle) of wine, wear those Bridget Jones knickers and above all…Have fun 😉
Catch you later lads,
Bernie Rose Violet xxx ❤ ❤ ❤
Last day of the challenge and I’m leaving you all in a sweat. (me, not you) I got to wear the leggings and sweatband again ( Koko is mortified, but I don’t care) and I’ve finally found a fun way to exercise and keep fit. I’ve ditched the diet and joined Zumbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa 😉
- Are you alright Bernie?
- I can’t breathe Julie
- That was tough wasn’t it?
- My body is fucked, I’m too old for this carry on
- Old my arse. Did you see that aul one in front of us? She was at least seventy five
- The one doing the slut drops?
- Yeah, she might have looked like Madonnas ma, but jesus she had the moves of an eighteen year old
- I never had moves like that, even when I was eighteen
- Get away out of that I saw you doing them booty bounces, you were on fire Bernie. Eat your heart out Beyoncé
- Says you, Nikki Minaj!
- Ah you can’t beat a bit of twerking Bernie, but do you know what? I’m so glad I wore my knicker stickers are you?
- I wore two, and my Bridget Jones specials as well…after my running accident, I wasn’t taking any chances
- You did right Bernie. It was good craic though wasn’t it?
- Brilliant Julie, but I thought we were going to do the beginners class?
- That WAS the beginners class Bernie
- Are you serious? I thought we’d gone to the advanced class by mistake
- Ah, we’re just out of practice, we’ll be slut dropping with Madonnas aul one in no time
- I’m not sure about them pelvic thrusts though Julie
- You can practice with Jimmy for next week…you are coming back next week aren’t you?
- Try stopping me Julie, poor Jimmy won’t know what hit him….
I think I’ve found my calling lads 😉
See you all in May 😉
- What are you doing under the stairs ma?
- I’m looking for Kylies old roller blades
- For what ma?
- For knitting a pair of gloves, what do you think?
- Calm down ma I’m only asking
- Have you seen them? I was sure they were under here
- Did da not sell them in the car boot sale last year?
- Ah for fuck sake, he did not…did he?
- You’re the one who told him to get rid of the shite from under the stairs
- An for once he did as I told him to …jaysis…MEN!
- Ma, what are you wearing?
- You can see what I’m wearing Koko
- A leotard and leg warmers…OMG, hang on ’til I get me phone
- Do not attempt to take a photo of me Koko, I’m warning you
- That headband but ma…what are you like?
- Feck off, I’m not that bad am I?
- I’m saying nothing, but holy god ma, are you thinking of going out like that…on roller blades?
- Well not anymore, now that I’ve no roller blades, anyway I was only going to go down the garden path
- Yeah, down on your face ma. When was the last time you went on blades?
- Well I had a pair of skates when I was 12…
- Ah ma, you really are gas. You’d break your neck
- I was watching Xanadu on Netflix and Olivia Newton John made it all look so easy
- Ma, you pissed your knickers when you tried running with auntie Julie, can you imagine what would happen on roller blades?
- Yeah, you’re right Koko. Who am I kidding, I’m too old for this lark
- You’re not old ma, but…
- But what?
- Lose the headband and leg warmers … the eighties are over
- Not a word to your da about this, do you hear me!
- I wouldn’t say a thing ma, but can I just take one photo to show Kylie
- Feck off…
What WAS I thinking 😩
🎶🎶 A place where nobody dared to go… lalalalalalala
They call it Xanaduuuu🎶🎶
- Where are you off to today Bernie?
- Shopping with Julie
- Again?I predict the smell the credit card melting
- I’m not buying anything; we’re just looking
- Are you not well?
- I’m buying nothing until I lose weight
- You must have lost some weight by now.
- Don’t start with me Jimmy
- You’re the one eating sneaky rasher sambos and big Macs
- ONE rasher sandwich, and ONE big Mac, Jesus make me feel guilty why don’t you
- You’re the one complaining about not losing weight, and I’m sick of this diet. How long are you…sorry WE on it
- Too bleedin’ long, and anyway, don’t be getting all judgemental with me, I know you’ve been down eating dinners in your mas, then coming back here for your salad
- A man can’t survive on lettuce alone
- Well I’m expected to
- Well you’re obviously wasting your time
- Thanks very much for the vote of confidence
- Anyway, you don’t need to lose weight
- Nothing fits me Jimmy. I feel huge
- You’re not huge
- All of my clothes are tight on me
- So buy bigger clothes…or stop with the sneaky rasher sambos
- Are you looking for a slap in the head?
- I don’t want to buy bigger clothes. I want to fit into the ones I have
- They look fine on you
- They do not! They make me look like an elephant…and if you mention that rasher sandwich again I swear I’ll swing for you
- It’s all in your mind Bernie, you look the same as you always do
- So you’re saying I always look fat?
- You don’t look fat
- You see me everyday, so you don’t notice
- I notice that you’re grand just the way you are
I don’t know whether to hit him or hug him!