April goals and Alcoholliers #AtoZChallenge

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Ok so as well as doing the AtoZ Challenge this month I’m also on a mission to lose weight before me alcoholliers. I could be fighting a losing battle because I get no encouragement from anyone in this gaff…

 

  • JIMMY!!
  • What?
  • What time is it?
  • It’s half past twelve
  • Well why does it say ten past eleven on these scales?
  • You’re standing on a weighing scales Bernie, not a bleedin’ clock
  • There’s a clock built into it
  • Who told you that?
  • Jason did when he bought it for me
  • Don’t be minding that fella, he’d say mass
  • But look it says 11.10 on the screen
  • That’s your weight Bernie…not the time
  • I’ve never been eleven stone in my life the bleedin’ cheek of you
  • Don’t blame me
  • I’ll kill that Jason fella
  • He didn’t eat cream cakes and chips Bernie, you did
  • Why would he even buy me a weighing scales anyway?
  • Because he asked you what you wanted for your birthday and you said, to lose weight, he was only being supportive
  • Supportive me hole
  • Well you know what to do now don’t you
  • I haven’t had a chip since last Friday…or a cream cake
  • Think on the positive side Bernie
  • What’s to be positive about?. I’m the size of an elephant
  • Well, it could be ten past eleven and you could be twelve and a half stone
  • Shurrup Jimmy!

scales

 

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12 thoughts on “April goals and Alcoholliers #AtoZChallenge

  1. I’m looking forward to 27 more delightful posts from you. I found you on the A to Z challenge last year but this year I’m not participating. Good luck with both your challenges – losing weight and writing every day! Tip No1. for the Battle of the Bulge which I’ve long lost many times over, THROW OUT ALL WEIGHING SCALES. It is most disheartening to stand on the scales every time and find that they haven’t moved the way you want them to move…… You just need to eat the right stuff – perhaps an App can help. I tried it once and it really worked . It tracks your food because what happens is that we often eat the WRONG foods rather than the right amounts…..

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    1. Ah hello, so happy you’re following my plight. I’m not much of a dieter, I haven’t got the willpower but if I want to get into my swimsuit without causing uproar on the Costa del Sol I’d better give it a lash. I didn’t have my glasses on when I read your reply first and I thought you said perhaps an Apple can help….I thought jesus, if it was only that easy 🙂 hahaha

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