#Hinching #AprilAtoz

H

Whitney bought a book and a bottle of wine for me for mothers day.

  • Hinch Yourself Happy. What the fuck is this all about Whit?
  • A woman who cleans her house. I thought it would cheer you up.
  • You thought a book about housework would cheer me up?
  • Well, it’s not just about cleaning. She gives some good tips as well.
  • Here’s a cleaning tip for you love, marry a man who earns enough money to hire someone to do the cleaning.
  • You like a good book ma, I thought you’d enjoy it.
  • I’ve been cleaning up after you lot for nearly thirty years. Whitney. I’ve arthritis in me knees from scrubbing floors, me hands are like prunes from all the washing up and cleaning windows; me back is fucked from hoovering, and on Mother’s day, you seriously think I want to read about some aul one going into raptures about cleaning her oven and bleaching her jax?
  • She’s not an aul one. She’s only in her twenties.
  • Ah jaysis, she has time to wise up then.
  • I follow her on Instagram ma, she cleans in a fun way.
  • The only time housework is fun Whitney, is when you’re sitting back with a large glass of wine watching someone else do it.
  • You might be surprised ma.
  • You know what would surprise me? You actually practicing what you preach for once.
  • What do you mean  ma?
  • Well, if this Mrs. Hinch is so fabulous and housework is such fun, why don’t you do it…or are you just happy watching her on Instagram?
  • Do you not like your Mother’s day present then?
  • Ah Whitney, I’m sorry if I sound ungrateful, but when you get to my age, you don’t tend to get too giddy at the prospect of finding a new toilet cleaner; unless it’s Aggie and Kim or Mrs. Doubtfire that’s the actual cleaner.
  • I tell you what ma; you sit down there and I’ll pour you that large glass of wine. You can chill out while I hoover the stairs .
  • Now you’re talking love.
  • Happy Mother’s day ma.
  • Ah, you’re very good to your aul Mammy.Thanks very much love, cheers for the book. I’ll  have a browse through it while I’m sipping me wine.

It’s not a bad aul read all the same, I was on chapter two before I even noticed, Whitney had hung out me washing and emptied the dishwasher as well. 😊

Maybe this Mrs. Hinch one isn’t so bad after all 😉

 

 

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