• Have ye seen me passport Bernie?
• Yeah
• Where is it
• I dunno
• Ye just said ye seen it
• I did, loads of times, awful lookin’ photo too Jimmy
• You’re bleedin’ hilarious Ber
• What d’ye want it for?
• I’m bookin’ me tickets to Paris
• I still can’t believe you’re goin’ to Paris without me
• It’s for de football Ber
• But Paris is our place Jimmy
• It’s the Euros Ber, and anyway, you hate football
• I could’ve gone shoppin’ while you were at the matches
• Would you feck off Bernie
• Ah I’m only messin’ with ye Jimmy
• Anyway you’ll be at your Spa
• Health farm Jimmy
• Whatever. Seriously Ber, have ye no idea where me passport  is?
• I haven’t a breeze Jimmy
•  I’ve searched the house and can’t find it. It’s a mystery Ber
• Would ye not call it a Jimmy Riddle love?
• Dat’s slang for a piddle Bernie
• Well, you’ll be wettin’yerself if ye don’t find it
• I’ll have to apply for an emergency one Ber
• …ah sure you can always come  with me and Julie and Ger
• Feck off. I’m not goin’ to a Spa with a gang of women
• It’s a bleedin’ health farm and we wouldn’t want ye inannyway. Ye can stay at home on yer own for all I care
• Dat’s harsh Bernie. Ye know I can’t miss de Euros
• Calm down will ye for fuck sake. Come on, I’ll help ye look for de bleedin’ passport

He’s worse than a child sometimes!