A few years ago now, Jimmy was out of work for a few weeks. He nearly drove me fucking mad. He was everywhere. I got up in the morning and he was waiting for his breakfast. I came back from the shops he was sitting there watching Jeremy Kyle. I was cooking the dinner and … Continue reading Under my feet…
2020 AtoZ
Blogging from AtoZ. April 2020
Tea and cakes.
I brought some cakes ma. Put the kettle on there.Oh lovely. What did you get?An eclair for me and a coffee slice for youAww I fancied a portfolioProfiterole maWHAT?PROFITEROLEYes pleaseI didn't buy anyYou just asked me if I wanted oneI didn'tMake your mind up will you. Did you buy portfolios or not?PRO- FIT- ER -OLESThat's … Continue reading Tea and cakes.
Shots
Maisie is in top form today🥴 Do you like shots,Bernie?From a gun or from a glass.Sure, what would you be doing with a gun?Don't tempt me to answer that one, ma.Very funny. So, do you like shots?I do love a baby guinness, that's about it.I prefer cocktails myself.Since when?Since Beyoncé introduced me to pornstar martinis. … Continue reading Shots
Royal birthday
We need to organise mas birthday, Jackie.I thought she didn't want anything?You know she says that every year.True, she's probably expecting something.Of course she is.She'll be surprised if there's no surprise.There'd be no living with her if we do nothing.So, what's the plan?Afternoon tea with a birthday cake and presents.We'd better get some prosecco.Of course, … Continue reading Royal birthday
Queen
What would you like to do for your birthday,ma?Don't mention my birthday.Why not?I don't want to know about it. So, no cake, no presents, no party?No, I'm too old for all that. I've celebrated enough birthdays.You're such a drama queen.I'm serious, old age has nothing going for it.Get away out of that.Why would I be … Continue reading Queen
Party gaff
This was Easter weekend a few years ago before any grandchildren came along. When I thought my kids could be trusted. 🙄 Me and Jimmy went away for a few days over the Easter break. I'd been up to me eyes with me ma and work and the whole lot. I warned my lot not … Continue reading Party gaff
O is for obituary
Back to 2018 when I wrote my dieting obituary. Best known for her love of karaoke and vodka shots, Bernie Rose Violet lived a full and happy life…until she decided to go on a diet. ”That was the day the music died for me” Bernie said, as she nibbled on a celery stick, and sipped … Continue reading O is for obituary
Neighbours
Another oldie reblog. I'm only cheating until I can catch up with my A to Z challenge , I swear to god.😛 Help me Rhonda, the neighbour across the road always twitching her curtain 'til Jimmy gets home Where were you Jimmy? I heard you pull up outside ages ago.Your dinner is ruined.Your one across … Continue reading Neighbours
Marilyn
Its been a very long, very busy weekend, not much writing done and I'm way behind on my AtoZ so I will be cheating by reblogging some oldies. First one is with my auntie Mal 🥰 Auntie Marilyn is mam's sister. I told her we were going on holiday to Wales to visit friends. I've … Continue reading Marilyn
Like sister and brother 😏
Your ma is still going on about how my ma tried to steal her boyfriend.My da you mean?Yeah, she said ma was a slut and wouldn't leave him alone.Thats gas.No it's not. My ma is not a slut and she said your da was the one chasing her.It's true. She only had eyes for my … Continue reading Like sister and brother 😏
Diary of a Dublin Housewife 