Tea and cakes.

  • I brought some cakes ma. Put the kettle on there.
  • Oh lovely. What did you get?
  • An eclair for me and a coffee slice for you
  • Aww I fancied a portfolio
  • Profiterole ma
  • WHAT?
  • Yes please
  • I didn’t buy any
  • You just asked me if I wanted one
  • I didn’t
  • Make your mind up will you. Did you buy portfolios or not?
  • That’s what I said. You said you didn’t buy any
  • Jaysis I didn’t
  • Ah go on I’ll have an eclair so.
  • The eclair is mine. You always have a coffee slice ma
  • I fancy a change
  • Well I don’t like coffee slices
  • Don’t be such a child Bernie and eat what you’re given
  • I bought them ma
  • We’ll cut them in half, have a bit of both
  • Oh just have the bleedin’ eclair ma
  • You’re in a right mood today Bernie. What’s wrong with you?
  • Nothing ma
  • Oooh this eclair is gorgeous Bernie, it’s like a large portfolio really isn’t it?
  • It’s a fucking PROFITEROLE
  • It’s an eclair Bernie
  • Lord give me fucking patience
  • Are you not eating your coffee slice?
  • No. I told you I don’t like them
  • What did you buy it for so? That was ridiculous. You should have bought yourself a portfolio
  • Yeah I should have shouldn’t I
  • That’s an awful waste of cake
  • I’ll bring it home for Jimmy
  • And sure leave it there. I’ll have it for me afternoon tea.


8 thoughts on “Tea and cakes.

  1. I can see portfolio coming into the vernacular with an alternate meaning. A friend of mine calls croissants, “angry termites = cross ants”…needless to say we do too now;) His was quite deliberate though unlike ma’s.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s all in the name isn’t it, a portfolio, a profiterole, an eclair but it’s all the same to ma! ….relax Bernie even had you of bought profiteroles you’d of been wrong!! 😃😃


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