I had a few scoops with Julie last night. I haven’t seen her since before I went on me alcoholliers so we were due a catch up.

• See they’re selling knickers with built in camel toe now Ber
• Feck off Julie
• I swear to God Bernie
• Who in their right mind would want to be flashing their fanny to all and sundry?
• Loads of people. They’re all the rage now I believe
• That’s just wrong, and disgusting too
• Well disgusting or not, they’re selling like hot cakes
• Young ones these days would wear anything
• Not like us you mean?
• I never had a camel toe in me life
• You wore pussy bows though Bern
• Pussy bows were on me blouse, not me fanny
• ..and ra ra skirts
• Don’t remind me
• ..and gold leggings
• Jaysis
• How did you get away with wearing them and not have a camel toe Bernie?
• Two pairs of knickers with double gusset
• Sexy bitch
• Bet into them I was. Remember lying on the bed to pull the zip up with a hanger and not being able to get up without being pulled up
• Same here, and you were afraid to go to the jax when you were out in case you couldn’t get them back up
• The things we did to be fashionable what?
• Camel toe but? We’d never go that far Bernie
• I remember wearing leg warmers, and I wasn’t even going to the gym
• …and fingerless gloves
• …Madonna bands
• …Bet Lynch earrings,they were like bleedin’ chandeliers
• We thought we were only massive
• We thought we were Bananarama
• *Nathan Jones you’ve been gone too long* I still remember the dance moves
• *Venus* I remember me ma nearly had a conniption cos I ripped me new jeans with her kitchen scissors so I’d be like Karen Woodward
• They’re selling them already ripped now, imagine?
• I know. Me ma couldn’t believe it when she saw our Whitney wearing them. ‘Has your mother not got a needle and thread to sew them up for ye love’ she said to her
• I hope she doesn’t go buying them camel toe knickers
• That’d be going a step too far. I don’t think she’s that stupid
• Maisie said the same about your ripped jeans Bernie
• She did too Julie. Oh to be young and foolish again
• Just young would do me Ber
• …and not just foolish
• I’ll drink to that
• I’ll drink to anything…cheers