Dead or Alive


  • See that chap died
  • What chap?
  • Used to wear an eye patch in the eighties
  • Mr. Doran from the flats?
  • No, he was a singer
  • Dr. Hook?
  • No
  • Captain Sensible
  • Who ?
  • Oh forget it…em Bryan Ferry
  • No
  • Fuck sake Jimmy, what did he look like?
  • I told you, he wore an eye patch
  • David Bowie wore an eye patch one time but he’s already dead
  • I think he became a woman
  • Who David Bowie
  • No, the chap with the eye patch…oh wait, I just remembered. Pete Burns
  • Ah no way…Dead or Alive
  • Dead I told you Bernie, jaysis keep up will ye
  • No Jimmy, I mean he was in the band ‘Dead or Alive’
  • Oh right yeah
  • You spin me right round baby right round…
  • …like a record baby, right round round round
  • Aww I loved that song
  • Was that the only song he had?
  • Must be. I don’t remember another one. Last time I saw him was in Celebrity Big Brother
  • That pile of shite?
  • He ruined himself with all that plastic surgery. He was a fine thing back in the day, especially with the eye patch
  • It’s a mugs game that plastic surgery lark
  • He said if he ever died and went to Heaven, God wouldn’t recognise him
  • I’d say he didn’t  recognise himself when he looked in the mirror Ber
  • God love him all the same. You know he was supposed to be on Loose Women this morning
  • I’m sure he’ll be spinning right round that he missed that one Bernie
  • Don’t be mean Jimmy


R.I.P. Pete

2 thoughts on “Dead or Alive

  1. I just saw this in the news – I agree, he looked quite good before all of the plastic surgery. I wonder if, like Michael Jackson and Joan Rivers, his addiction to surgery contributed to his heart attack…

    I hope that he is at peace, now.


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