Jimmy’s brother Anto can be a pain in the arse. I think he only calls over to my house to annoy me. His missus doesn’t let him watch telly or eat junk food. They don’t even own a telly. Imagine not owning a telly in this day and age. Geraldine is a very new age hippy type,into feng shui and auras and the like.She’s not a bit like his ex Breda. She didn’t give a shite what he did. Geraldine makes sure he does what he’s told at home.   He called over the other night…

• Is Jimmy home?
• No, he’s working late
• What time will he be home?
• I don’t know. I’ll tell him you called
• I’ll wait for him
• He could be hours
• I don’t mind
• Suit yourself
• What are you watching?
• Coronation Street
• You still watch that shite?
• I like it
• Is Bet Lynch still in it?
• How do you know Bet Lynch?
• I remember her from watching it in me Mas
• I thought you said it was shite
• It is, but I had to watch it because me ma watched it. I’d no choice
• Well same here Anto
• What about Vera?
• Vera who?
• Jack’s wife who worked in the factory
• Oh you mean Duckworth?
• Yeah that’s her
• She died
• Really? How did Jack take it?
• He died too
• Aww, that’s terrible. I liked them
• I thought you didn’t like it
• Well I liked them, and Hilda Ogden
• She left years ago
• Yeah, me ma told me her husband died
• He did yeah
• Jasus, they’re dropping like flies in that programme
• That’s soaps for ye Anto
• Thank God for Deirdre Barlow what
• She’s dead
• Are you serious? Ken looks so happy there.
• He doesn’t know yet
• Why not?
• Because this was filmed weeks ago. She was still alive then
• I don’t get you
• She died in real life Anthony, but she’s still alive in the programme
• So where is she?
• She’s away visiting her auntie
• Blanche must be in bits
• What?
• Her ma, Blanche, they were very close
• Blanche died two years ago Anto
• Ah no way. Fuck off…not Blanche. She was gas
• Not anymore, her dog is still alive though
• It’s a dog’s life so
• It is. I’ve missed half me programme now with you going on about dead people
• The ads are on already?
• Do you want to head off? I’ll tell Jimmy to call you
• Ah no, I’m grand here. Sure I may as well wait for the second half
• If you must
• Are you making a cup of tea Bernie
• I suppose so
• Have you any biscuits?
• I thought you weren’t allowed eat biscuits?
• What Geraldine doesn’t know won’t hurt her
• She must never get hurt so
• What?
• Nothing
• Have you any custard creams?
• No, just fig rolls
• Aw, I fancied a custard cream but they’ll do I suppose
• I’m sorry for you
• Hurry up Bernie, the ads are over. You’re missing it

Fuck off Anto!