• What are you doing with the pin Bernie?
• Apart from stickin’ it in your arse ye mean?
• Why? What did I do?
• I just got off the phone from Ger
• Ger Byrne?
• No, your sister in law Ger
• Oh right, how’s young Petrocelli doin’
• Her name is Patchouli Jimmy, for fuck sake, how many times have you to be told?
• Yeah yeah, whatever
• Anyway, stop changing the subject
• What subject?
• Of you telling Ger I couldn’t wait to go to the health farm with her. How I was counting the minutes ’til de weekend
• Oh that, yeah, ha right
• You’re not funny Jimmy
• Well you were the one who said you didn’t want her to know you didn’t want to go
• So, you decided to tell her I was ‘living’ for it?
• Ah now I wouldn’t go that far Ber
• Well I would! It took me ages to convince her to give my place to Willow
• But sure she was tryin’ to book Willow in yesterday when I was over. Practically begged your one to squeeze her in for the weekend.
• …and you didn’t think to tell me that? Or to suggest Willow went instead of me?
• …well it wasn’t my place
• My arse Jimmy. You’re such a knob head sometimes.
• No need for that talk Bernie
• There’s every need Jimmy Doyle
• Anyway, what’s that got to do with you brandishing a pin in my direction
• I’m goin’ to stick it in a map of Spain
• Why?
• Because wherever it lands, is where I’m goin’
• When?
• The weekend I was meant to go to the Health farm
• Why?
• Because I’m SOOOOO disappointed I’m not going with Ger, I need to get away
• On your own?
• Julie’s coming with me
• I thought she was looking after her sick mother
• Her ma is much better now and her auntie May is comin’ over to visit, so Julie is free for the week. Right ,hold that map straight for me.
• Mind where your waving that pin, open your eyes Bernie
• Right, where did it land?
• Give us a look Ber. Sierra Nevada. That’s a mountain range. Are yiz goin’ mountain climbing?
• Fuck off, give us your pen for a minute
• Here. What’s that for
• X marks the spot Jimmy
• Benidorm? That’s bleedin’ miles from there
• Close enough for me Jimmy
• You’re some chancer. I bet you already have Benidorm booked haven’t you?
• Ask no questions Jim Bob…right I’m off out to buy a new swimsuit. See ye later alligater. Your dinner is in the chipper
• That’s lovely alright!

Don’t you just love it when a plan comes together 😉