Meeting

I swear, the more kids I’ve had, the more they drove me mad. I don’t remember having the same trouble with Kylie as I do with Coco.

She’s a right cheeky madame, even started spelling her name with a K. Thinks she’s one of them Kardashian girls. ” What’s wrong with Coco Chanel, who you were named after?” says I to her. ” She’s dead ma” was the reply. I told you she’s a cheeky bitch

  • Where were you?
  • What do you mean?
  • I mean where were you…what do you think I mean?
  • Where do you think I was?
  • Don’t get smart with me young lady and don’t keep answering my questions with more questions. Now, where were you?
  • In school
  • School finished over an hour ago, and it only takes ten minutes to walk home
  • I was talking to me friend
  • Who’s your friend?
  • You don’t know him
  • Him? Who’s him
  • I told you. Me friend
  • Is he your boyfriend?
  • Ma!!
  • What?
  • What?
  • Is he?
  • No…. Yeah
  • Serious? How long are you going out with him?
  • Going out? What’s going out?
  • Dating?
  • Nobody days dating anymore ?
  • What do they say?
  • They don’t say anything. I’m just meeting him
  • You’re only fifteen Coco. I don’t want you ‘meeting’ boys
  • Give over ma
  • I won’t give over. I’ve heard of this “meeting” and it’s more than just actually meeting
  • You haven’t a clue ma
  • I’ve got five kids
  • What’s that got to do with anything
  • I know where “kissing with tongues” leads
  • Ma, stop it
  • No I won’t stop it. You need to have some self respect, not like some of the little trollops up that school, who drop their knickers when they’re barely out of nappies
  • Ah ma, stop exaggerating
  • I’m not exaggerating
  • …and I’m not dropping me knickers for anyone
  • Good
  • Grand
  • So, who is he then?
  • Ah ma…
  • I’ll find out. You know I will…
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Privacy … Sign of the times

Kids these days, they tell you nothing. God be with the days when there was only one phone in the house and everyone heard all of your business. Now they don’t even use the landline and their phones are forever stuck to their hands. Back in my day we had no phone. I had to go down the road to the public call box  by the shops to call me fella…more privacy back then  😉

  • Who were you on the phone to Whitney?
  • My friend
  • What friend?
  • Just a friend from school
  • What’s her name
  • Why do you want to know?
  • I’m just asking you a question
  • And I told you, a friend
  • Was it a fella?
  • What makes you think it was a fella?
  • Because you won’t tell me who it was
  • I told you it was a friend
  • And I asked you, what friend?
  • Why are you giving me the third degree ma?
  • Because I’m your ma and you’re only a child
  • I’m sixteen ma
  • Exactly…so?
  • So what?
  • So it was a fella
  • What if it was?
  • Why can’t you just say you were talking to a fella?
  • What’s the difference if it’s a boy or a girl? He’s just a friend
  • Then why didn’t you tell me which it was?
  • Because you’d make a big deal out of it, like you are now
  • I’m not making a big deal out of it
  • You are. A friend is a friend
  • But if you were talking to Leanne, you’d say you were talking to Leanne
  • But I wasn’t talking to Leanne
  • So who is he?
  • Just a friend
  • What’s his name?
  • Why?
  • I just want to know. Why are you afraid to tell me?
  • I’m not afraid to tell you. You don’t know him so no point telling you his name
  • You were talking for a very long time. What were you talking about?
  • I wasn’t that long talking to him and we were just talking about stuff
  • What stuff?
  • Just stuff. Jaysis ma is nothing private in this house?
  • Is he your boyfriend Whitney?
  • MA!!
  • Just tell me
  • No
  • No he’s not your boyfriend?
  • No, I’m not telling you
  • Maybe you’ll tell your da when he comes in
  • Ah ma for gods sake
  • What?
  • Stop telling da stuff
  • He’s your da he should know if you have a boyfriend
  • You’re doing my head in. I’m going to my room
  • Is that him on the phone?
  • What?
  • I just heard your phone beep
  • So?
  • So,is that why you’re going to your room?
  • No, I’m going to my room because you’re wrecking my head ma

I’ll find out, don’t you worry…