So, Jimmy thinks I’ve finally lost the plot…

• Bernie, I’m up on a roof, it looks like snow and I need to finish here today. I don’t have time for your conspiracy theories.
• It’s not a conspiracy theory, Jimmy. I think Danny is under police protection.
• Stop calling him Danny will you.
• But it’s his name.
• Our neighbour is not called Danny De Vito.
• It is. He told me himself.
• You just made that up.
• I swear he told me. His name is Danny. Well Daniel, but not DeVito. He said to call him Dan.
• Look I can’t talk to you now. I need to finish this roof before the weather gets any worse.
• But we could have a murderer living across the road.
• Danny De Vito is not a murderer.
• You said to stop calling him Danny De Vito.
• Jaysis, Bernie. You have me head melted. Danny whateverhisname is, is not a murderer.
• How do you know?
• They don’t put murderers under police protection.
• Do they not?
• No. Don’t be silly.
• But you think he could be under witness protection?
• No, I don’t.
• But you said…
• Bernie, I said I have to go before I fall off this bleedin’ roof.
• OK, Stay safe Jimmy, but hurry home.
• I’ll be home at five.
• Great. You can help me with the Christmas tree.
• You said you weren’t putting up a tree this year.
• I changed my mind.
• Is this because of Danny Christmas’s winter wonderland across the road?
• Don’t be silly. By the way, have you seen our Frosty?
• Our what?
• Frosty the ten foot snowman. I thought he was in the garage but he’s not there.
• I gave him to Christy.
• What? Why?
• You said you hated him and there wasn’t a snowballs chance in Hell he was going up this year.
• Feck sake Jimmy. I want my Frosty back.
• Too late. He’s up on top of Christy’s front porch.
• Well, we’ll have to buy a new one.
• Heaven help me, Bernie. You change your mind like the bloody weather. I just can’t keep up.
• See you later Jimmy, and don’t come home without Frosty.

Can you believe, Danny De Vito thought I wasn’t finished decorating?

I’ll show him.