Ahhh Bisto

~ Diary of a Dublin housewife

  • I’m just off to get my nails done, Jimmy.
  • Again?
  • What do you mean again?
  • You only got them done a few weeks ago.
  • Yeah, so I need them done again.
  • They can’t be much use in that saloon if you’ve to go so often.
  • It’s called a salon. It’s a nail bar not a watering trough in the wild west.
  • Saloon, salon. Same difference.
  • It’s a business.
  • It’s a money making racket.
  • Would you feck off. It’s called business.
  • I don’t know why you can’t do them yourself, my ma always did her own nails.
  • Yeah, and your ma also used gravy browning on her legs back in the day, because she couldn’t afford nylons.
  • Did she? That’s mad.
  • Speaking of browning, I’m having a spray tan as well.
  • Have we no Bisto in the cupboard?
  • You’re very funny.
  • Well, if it’s good enough for me ma…
  • Maybe I’ll put a blue rinse in me hair as well?
  • I’ll ask me ma if she has any.
  • So, you won’t be going the pub tonight?
  • What?
  • Oh, I thought you’d be brewing your own beer?
  • When did I ever brew my own beer?
  • I think you should start. That pub is a rip off.
  • Really?
  • Yeah, As soon as you drink a pint, you’ve to order another one. It’s a money making racket.
  • What time did you say your nail appointment is? You don’t want to be late, Ber.

I’ll burst him one of these days, I swear.

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