• Where are you off to today Bernie?
• Shopping with Julie
• Again?I predict the smell the credit card melting
• I’m not buying anything; we’re just looking
• Are you not well?
• I’m buying nothing until I lose weight
• You must have lost some weight by now.
• Don’t start with me Jimmy
• You’re the one eating sneaky rasher sambos and big Macs
• ONE rasher sandwich, and ONE big Mac, Jesus make me feel guilty why don’t you
• You’re the one complaining about not losing weight, and I’m sick of this diet. How long are you…sorry WE on it
• Too bleedin’ long, and anyway, don’t be getting all judgemental with me, I know you’ve been down eating dinners in your mas, then coming back here for your salad
• A man can’t survive on lettuce alone
• Well I’m expected to
• Well you’re obviously wasting your time
• Thanks very much for the vote of confidence
• Anyway, you don’t need to lose weight
• Nothing fits me Jimmy. I feel huge
• You’re not huge
• All of my clothes are tight on me
• So buy bigger clothes…or stop with the sneaky rasher sambos
• Are you looking for a slap in the head?
• What?
• I don’t want to buy bigger clothes. I want to fit into the ones I have
• They look fine on you
• They do not! They make me look like an elephant…and if you mention that rasher sandwich again I swear I’ll swing for you
• It’s all in your mind Bernie, you look the same as you always do
• So you’re saying I always look fat?
• You don’t look fat
• You see me everyday, so you don’t notice
• I notice that you’re grand just the way you are

I don’t know whether to hit him or hug him!

😡😡😡