Gymslip mammy

Me pal Rita called round for a cuppa this morning. She always has the gossip

Howya Bernie
Howya Rita, any news?
Did you hear Vera Moran’s young one is pregnant?
Louise? Again? Jaysis she only had twins last year
No, the younger one, Laura
Ah stop, you’re messin’
I’m not
But she’s only a child herself Rita
She’s nearly fifteen
Oh my God, Vera was only telling me about her studying for her exams in June
Well looks like it’s not only her books she was studying Bern
Remember when we were her age? We were still in knee socks
… and playing with dolls
Ah I wouldn’t go that far, sure I met my Mick when I was only fifteen
You were an early starter Rita
Are you saying I was easy Bernie Rose Violet?
I never said that, will ye feck off being so bleedin’ sensitive
Well feck off insinuating then
So how far gone is she? Vera’s young one I mean
Seven months
Mother of Divine, how did she hide it for so long? When did Vera find out?
She hadn’t a clue. She only found out last weekend when she walked into her bedroom and the young one was examining her bump in the mirror
Sweet Jaysis, she must have nearly died
Ye, she pulled her top down real quick when her ma walked in
I mean Vera must have nearly died
Ah yeah, can you imagine the shock of it
Her baby having a baby…jaysis I’d die, she’s younger than my Whitney
And a quiet young one too, not wild like some of them
I know, a lovely kid she is, and Vera was always strict with her
Well, she kept her on a tight leash after Louise got pregnant
Not tight enough obviously Rita
Or too tight even. Sure the poor young one couldn’t go as far as the corner shop without Vera ringing her
I don’t know how she got pregnant
Will I draw you a diagram?
Ha, feck off. You know what I mean Bernie. I wonder how she got away from Vera for long enough
That’s true Rita, so who’s the father, do you know?
She won’t say. Brian is going mental. He said he’s going to chop the mickey off whoever it is
Jaysis, no wonder she wont tell.
I know, that Brian fella has an awful temper on him
Well, all I can say is … God help the poor young fella whoever he is
Rumour has it that it’s Charlie O’Malley’s young fella
Are ye serious? That little fart in the can
Charlie was always a little scut, his son is the same, always in trouble.
How in the name of God did a lovely young one like Laura get mixed up with him?
Well Charlie and Brian are mates since way back. The kids must have met at some family thing
I can’t see them being mates after this
Brian is a bit of a mad scone, he’ll do time for this Bernie, you mark my words
He is a law unto himself, Lord only knows what he’ll do
He’ll bate lumps ou’ve the pair of them
Poor Vera, she’s an awful lot to put up with
She’s heartbroken God love her
Sure isn’t it happening to young ones everyday Rita
It is Bernie. Babbies having babbies
I know, and in this day and age, there’s no need for it
Have they never heard of contraception?
Have they never heard of keeping their knickers on Rita?