The pubs and off licences are all closed on Good Friday. Jimmy is not a bit pleased. You’d swear they were never going to open again. He’s been pacing the house like a caged tiger all day.
- Sit down Jimmy will ye. You’re making me dizzy
- I’ve a pain in me arse sitting down Bernie
- Well go out for a walk then
- A walk where?
- I don’t know. The park, the shops, your ma’s
- The park will be full of kids. The shops will be full of crazy shoppers stocking up as if they were expecting a nuclear attack instead of a long weekend…and me ma will be at the church all day doing the stations of the cross
- Well go out and do the garden then
- Ah, it’s too damp out to cut the grass
- Do a bit of weeding then
- Ah me back is not the best today Bernie, I’ll only make it worse if I bend down
- Well do something Jimmy ‘cause you’re getting on my nerves
- Well if the bleedin’ pubs were open I could go for a pint
- I knew that’s what was wrong with you. It’s only one day Jimmy for fuck sake
- Yeah, the one day I’m off work and can actually go for a pint, I can’t
- You go for a pint every night Jimmy
- Not tonight tho’ Bernie. Even Jesus had a pint at the last supper.
- He did not Jimmy
- Well, he had wine then
- Not in a pub tho’
- It’s ridiculous that they keep the pubs closed of a good Friday in this day and age. My mouth is as dry as bleedin’ Ghandi’s flip- flop
- Have a can from the fridge if you’re that desperate
- It’s not the same Bernie. I’m not a house drinker. I like the ambience of the pub with me mates
- The ambience? The smell of beer and farts in that bar would knock you out sometimes
- It’s not that bad Bernie
- The gas emmisions would turn the air blue
- Don’t exaggerate
- Well, you probably do most of the farting Jimmy so you wouldn’t notice
- You’re very pass remarkable today. I suppose yours smell of roses
- Rose by name rose by nature Jimmy
- What does that make me then Bernie?
- Well they do say violets are blue
- You’re hilarious
- If the cap fits Jimmy
- Fuck off, I’m going to get a can
Roll on Saturday!
Wish the pub I work at was closed on Good Friday – had an exhausting shift yesterday, and probably another one today and tomorrow too! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hope you had a day off for the Easter bunny 😉
LikeLike
Not yet – off tomorrow though!
LikeLike
Ha Ha! This was hilarious!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great blog. Hope the can did the trick 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
The first one didn’t but the other 8 did the trick 😉
LikeLike
Good Friday fun. Sounds a lot like a conversation I would have had.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank God the pubs are only closes twice a year!! lol
LikeLike
LOL Inconveniences all around.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Gotta love the husband/wife banter 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person